Breaking up with your girlfriend isn’t and shouldn’t be an easy thing to do, well not if you actually cared for her in the first place. Personally I think that most men struggle with the idea of breaking up with a girlfriend far more than women do. In some ways that has to do with the fact that when a woman does decide to finally break up with a guy that she’s been given more than enough reason to finally say goodbye. Plus that the psychological makeup of women is just different enough to men that when a woman does break up with you she can consign you to the further reaches of her short term memory and simply move on.
So what I’m saying here is that there might be a number of ways to break up with your girlfriend but that doesn’t mean that you need to be cruel about it, but you also need to avoid all the clichés and catchphrases that most other people use. Here’s a line from a song you’ve probably all heard, and it’s worth remembering if and when you decide that it’s time to end a certain relationship:
“Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts; don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours” – Baz Luhrman
So here are some tips for how you can actually break up with a girlfriend in the most honorable and painless (well relatively painless) way.
Three Tips On How To Break Up With Your Girlfriend
If you’re a decent sort of guy then you don’t want to hurt your soon-to-be ex-girlfriends feelings, so you’ll probably be tempted to use some little white lies instead. By lying to her you’ll feel that you’re protecting her somehow, but she will eventually find out that you were lying to her and that will be the end of any potential friendship with her you might have hoped for. Being honest at the end of a relationship is one of the toughest things you can do but it will leave you with a clean slate emotionally once you’re single again – that’s worth an awful lot in emotional currency. Just be grown up enough to deliver your honest reasons for breaking up with her without upsetting her if possible – remember this is a woman you loved in the not too distant past. Like Baz said “Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts”.
Knowing when to break up with your girlfriend is a question I get asked pretty frequently by friends, but the only wisdom I can really share on this is that you’ll know when the right time is. Don’t, of course, attempt a break up during a wedding, funeral or other emotionally charged event – if you do then you only have yourself to blame for the consequences. Under normal circumstances very few men are going to break up with their girlfriends as a spur of the moment decision, so you’d be wise to not do the same. There is not “right” time for ending any relationship but the longer you delay the process the more sudden and upsetting the break up can be for both of you when it does eventually come.
I know there’s a growing trend in people using texts, emails, Tweets and Facebook relationship status updates to end relationships, but that’s the worst possible way to go about it for a number of reasons. Any female friends who see you breaking up with a girl via Facebook will not want you dating her or any of her friends anytime soon – it shows that you’re the kind of ass who doesn’t care about a girl’s feelings. So unless you have no other choice please, please do the break-up face to face. No it’s not easy and yes you probably will get upset too, but that’s called growing up and believe me in the years to come even if she’s still pissed at you for breaking up with her she’ll admire that you were man enough to do it to her face – something which 90% of men simply aren’t capable of.
There’s no such thing as the perfect way to break up with your girlfriend but timing it right, being honest with her and doing it in person are steps in the right direction.
Do you have any tips for guys reading this who are struggling to find the best way to break up with their girlfriend?
If so maybe you’re like to share your advice in a comment below this article?