Try as you might not every relationship can be saved, no matter what you do, what you say or even with the help of professional counseling – sometimes people simply want “out” of their marriage. Sadly sometimes marriage can, in some rare cases, serve as nothing more than a magnifying glass which highlights the fact that your relationship was already in distress long before you got married.
Some people assume that marriage (or even worse having kids together) is some kind of magical fairy dust which heals all emotional wounds and makes you fall more deeply in love. While marriage does deepen your commitment to your partner, it can also put more strain on a relationship – sometimes just because people freak out that their relationship is now a legally binding contract, for example. In short getting married isn’t a quick fix for a doomed relationship, nor should it be used as a way to keep somebody in your life when you know they’d be happier with somebody else, or simply happier out of the relationship.
For those of you reading this who are either in the middle of a divorce, or considering divorce as an option I can only say that you are not alone and sometimes it takes far more courage to walk away from a bad marriage than to stay in one. Every single day tens of thousands of people have to make one of the hardest decisions that they’ll ever have to make – ending a marriage. In fact getting divorced is ranked as one of the 3 most stressful things you can experience, outside of a death in the family or, oddly enough, having to move house. So if you’re feeling stressed, upset or confused about what you’re going to do next, what you’re feeling is entirely natural and all part of the process.
Divorce is one of those life events which tends to affect both men and women in equal amounts, although what you see portrayed most often in the media is the loving wife having to divorce her cheating husband – but then the media only ever report what they’re paid to report. In real life a marriage can be ended by either partner, so the books on divorce I review here are going to be designed for couples, for men and for women too. At least that way you’ll see that I’m not biased in any way in dealing with this topic, because I know that even when two great people, who love each other, get married sometimes it simply doesn’t work out. Sadly divorce sometimes simply can’t be avoided or prevented.
I’m also going to take a look at books which cover the actual process of getting divorced, which will include organization and planning guides, books on separation to test if the marriage might be salvageable and books on recovering from the divorce itself, because most people have no idea how much emotional and psychological fallout a divorce can cause for everyone involved. Basically I’m going to be reviewing as wide a range of books on divorce as exists on Amazon right now, with something to help you regardless of where you are right now in the divorce/separation process.
Remember that the majority of the books I’ll be reviewing are written by people who have been through the divorce process themselves, or are subject matter experts, so the advice they share is practical and should help you see divorce in a new light, if they can’t help you save your marriage in the first place.
Here’s a quick list of the books I’ll be reviewing in the not too distant future: