If you ask any of your friends about long distance relationships they’ll probably throw their eyes to heaven, sigh and tell you that “…long distance relationships just don’t work”.
So although it might seem like a negative note to start off on it’s probably best to get the “bad” stuff out of the way first, at least then I can focus on the techniques you can put into play to make pretty much any long distance relationship work, almost regardless of the circumstances.
Why Long Distance Relationships Don’t Work
The real reason for this type of relationship not working is not a lack of interest from either person but simply because one person or the other has started to take the relationship for granted. You see what tends to happen, just like in normal relationships, is that one person tends to wind up doing all the traveling, all the emailing, all the texting and all the calling. This eventually leads to resentment on the other person’s part, who then goes looking for love closer to home – or further away from home for that matter. The distance is obviously a factor in some relationships breaking down, but it usually just highlights that there were problems in your relationship in the first place and the distance just made these really, really obvious to one or both of you.
5 Tips To Make A Long Distance Relationship Work
So now we can get down to the reason why you’re reading this blog post in the first place – making a long distance relationship actually work.
Don’t Take Anything For Granted
Yup, that’s right the easiest way to make a long distance relationship work is to value your time with your partner, and to put in your 50% of the traveling, email, calling, texting, etc, etc. Nobody likes being taken for granted, so never let that happen. If for whatever reason it’s been mentioned to you by your partner that you do take the relationship for granted then correct your course straight away and keep your side of the bargain. If you don’t I can assure you that you won’t have a relationship to worry about in the very near future.
When you do get to actually spend time together then understand that the other person might want to go out instead of staying in, or would rather enjoy a night of pizza, wine and Netflix with you then a crazy night partying in town. I know some psychologists are against the idea of compromise because it means surrendering a part of yourself, but you can take it from me that when it comes to a long distance relationship if you really do give a damn about the other person then you won’t mind surrendering a little bit of your “life” for them.
Learning all the skills you need to make this type of relationship work isn’t something you’re going to just pick up overnight – it can take weeks or even months to figure what works for both of you. If something isn’t working then change it up and approach it from another angle – there’s usually a way to keep both people in the relationship happy.
Enjoy The Moments
If you want a fun way to “spend the evening” with your significant other – even though they’re miles away – then you could try watching a really cheesy movie like Sharknado or Piranhaconda and chat it about it by text, Skype or over the phone. Obviously if you hate those types of movies that won’t help, so just pick a movie genre you both enjoy instead.
Okay some people think this is really, really sleazy but it’s better than no sex at all, plus you’re “doing it” with somebody you actually love instead of some random guy or girl. You can try it once and if you hate it then no biggie because you never have to do it again!
A big part of making a long distance relationship work is communication, so talk to each other about what works for you and what doesn’t. At least that way there’s no sudden surprises for either of you!