So your relationship has ended badly and the only thought on your mind right now is about how you can get revenge on your ex girlfriend right? As a guy that’s a totally understandable reaction if you’ve just been dumped because your pride is hurt and there might even be the possibility that you’ve been cheated on too. Basically if you’re a guy and the only thing you can think of right now is how to get even with your ex girlfriend then chances are you’ve been badly hurt by her.
But is revenge the best way to go about doing things? Sure you might have information about her like pictures, texts or emails that you could share with friends and you’d probably create a small amount of scandal around her by doing this. The reality is though that whatever scandal you create today will be replaced by somebody else’s scandal or news tomorrow and after all the laughter has died down that’s when you start to feel bad for what you just did, said or showed people in relation to your ex. People will also get very bored, very quickly of having to listen to the same jokes or stories about your ex every time they meet you. Do yourself a favor and don’t do the “broken record” routine because eventually your friends will stop listening.
Wanting revenge is a very normal reaction to have when somebody hurts you but it’s also such a powerful feeling that it can emotionally hijack you and at that point you stop thinking like a normal, rational human being and you start using your animal instincts instead. This is the dangerous point when you could very easily do or say something you’ll regret for the rest of your life, either from a personal or legal point of view.
Revenge can take many forms too by the way – it can include aggressive phone calls, dating/sleeping with one of her friends, confronting your ex with her new boyfriend, sharing intimate details of your relationship through Twitter or Facebook or a whole host of other things. The digital age has presented us with the ability to share information with people at the speed of thought but it’s also good to remember that once you share something online it’s out there forever – you can’t ever take it back.
So when you reach the point that you think revenge is your best or only option the best thing to do is absolutely nothing for 24-hours. Put your cell phone away, turn off your computer and go see a movie. Remove any way for you to contact your ex or spread information about her for at least one entire day. What you’ll normally find is even though you might have been furious on a Monday afternoon that by Tuesday evening a lot of that anger has faded.
This might sound like the ultimate cliché but forgiveness is the key to you getting on with your life. Believe me it sucks to forgive people who have hurt you but there’s a lot of healing in forgiveness and you’ll look like a much better person for doing it. In fact you’ll probably notice that other women really admire your mature approach to the situation. Mature and reasonable men who don’t go insane over their ex girlfriends can be very attractive to prospective new girlfriends.
So instead of spending hours or days figuring out how to get revenge on your ex girlfriend invest that time in improving yourself as a man and as a person in general – you’ll come out looking better at the end of it either way.