If you’re reading this feature article it’s because you’ve just been dumped by somebody and it probably happened pretty unexpectedly too right? The most upsetting breakups are the ones that we never see coming and the fact that we don’t see them coming is probably a testament to the fact that your relationship was already in quite a bit of trouble but you were just either deliberately ignoring it or you were oblivious to it in the first place.
Whatever the reason for your relationship ending you’re looking for some tips to get your ex back so I’ll get into those straight away to save you having to wait around!
5 Tips To Follow To Get Your Ex Back
A lot of people spend as much time as possible with their ex to stop them meeting new people (or in the hope of achieving that) but this will actually work against you, in fact your ex will get sick of you hanging out of them pretty fast. The “no contact” rule is the oldest one in the book and you should avoid contact with your ex for at least the first 5 – 7 days after the break up.
This is probably one of the most important tips for getting your ex back because you need to allow them time to calm down and to start missing what you both had together.
How important for you is it to be “right” in every argument? Is it important enough to have your ex gone from your life forever? Or is it worth apologizing for what was mostly likely a very silly thing to argue over in the first place?
Couples tend to argue most deeply over the most trivial of things as a way of expressing their anger over far deeper personal issues. If you look at the argument logically, instead of emotionally, it might not have anything do with you at all. The argument could be because your ex is projecting a past emotional or psychological hurt onto you and this is just their coping mechanism for dealing with it. In either case being the first person to say the words “I’m sorry” puts you at a psychological advantage.
Stay In Shape In Every Way
There’s a huge temptation to stop eating well, showering and working out a few times per week after a break up. After all what’s the point now the love of your life is gone? Well how attractive do you think they’ll find you if they call around and find you looking and smelling like you’ve slept in a dumpster for the last few weeks? You’re just reaffirming their belief that breaking up with you was the right thing to do.
Dressing well, smelling great and being in great shape will boost your own confidence, bring out the jealousy genie in your ex and also never forget that working out releases lots of endorphins which make you feel great and are a natural cure for depression.
Sitting at home isn’t going to do any good so get out there, flirt and enjoy your life. This doesn’t mean that you should start dating other people immediately (that’s a bad idea in fact) and definitely don’t get into a rebound relationship with somebody else if you can avoid it.
Another thing to watch out for is to avoid getting into situations with “friends with benefits” too soon – this can totally backfire on you more quickly and in more ways than you might expect. Plus if you really do want to get your ex back tips like “Don’t sleep around” should be common sense – how do you think your ex would react if they found out you were doing your impression of Joey from “Friends” a week after the breakup?
It’s okay to let you ex know that you’re “there” for them in terms of being available to talk and meet up if necessary but that doesn’t mean waiting around for them to contact you. “Being there” for somebody should never mean that you sacrifice your own personal interests to make them feel better about their lives or, even worse, feel better about the breakup.
If you create a habit of “being there” for them you could very quickly turn into an agony uncle/aunt and wind up helping them deal with their new relationship problems – bad move and there’s no way you’ll wind up back with your ex after that.
Hopefully you’ve enjoyed my collection of free tips to get your ex back. Just remember that getting your ex back isn’t going to happen overnight so be patient and use the tips above and you’ll be surprised at just how quickly your ex will be looking to get back together with you.